If you’re both a fan of Star Citizen, the beyond ambitious–and unfinished–space sim, and the act of burning money, Cloud Imperium has you covered. Recently, the developer unveiled the almost comically expensive Legatus Pack. The new bundle gives players access to 117 ships and other extras–all for a cool $27,000. Also, you’ll need to drop $1,000 upfront to even view the content. That…seems like a bit much to ask for a bunch of digital spacecrafts.
Now, I’m not one to tell people how to spend their money. Okay, that’s not true because otherwise, this article wouldn’t exist. But if you’ll allow me to play financial adviser for a bit, I’d be more than happy to recommend more worthwhile investments to put that extra cash towards. So stay your credit card hand for just a few more minutes and hear me out.
Instead of piloting a fake spaceship, why not hop behind the wheel of an actual vehicle? Depending on your residence, owning a car is practically a must. $27,000 can easily score a good used car. It even approaches the asking price of some brand-new vehicles! Already own a car? Pimp it out and make Xzibit proud. Some renovations could make it look like a space station, so you can have your cake and eat it too. Now, I admit that a lowly Earth automobile lacks the sheer cool factor of an intergalactic dreadnaught. However, you can’t pick up groceries, take a road trip, or impress dates (maybe) with a polygonal spacecraft. I’ve always said this.
Your Child’s College Fund
For the parents playing Star Citizen: can you comfortably drop that kind of dough while looking into little Timmy’s college-bound eyes? How can young Wendy become a pro-wrestling astronaut/veterinarian if she can’t afford to attend the finest schools? Invest in the future. By that, I mean an actual future and not the fictional future of a game whose real-life future remains up in the air.
More Video Games
Why blow $27,000 on a single game when you can instead buy ALL OF THE GAMES? And consoles. And an uber nice television, comfy couch, several cases of Mountain Dew, and a fancy game room to house it all. You may even have enough money to fly to Japan, visit Square Enix, and bribe them into giving you a full breakdown of Final Fantasy VII Remake’s progress.
Play the Stock Market
What if your money worked for you instead? Purchase some stock and watch that $27,000 double in value over time. Or lose it all due to a volatile market. I’m not a stock market whiz so maybe you should play Grand Theft Auto V first if you need practice.
Travel the World
Why stop at visiting Japan? Go hog wild with a full world tour! You’ve got $27,000 sitting under a mattress, for Pete’s sake! Meditate atop the Great Pyramid of Giza. Swing on a vine across the Amazon rainforest. Share a kiss in front of the Eiffel Tower. Narrowly avoid molten lava in Hawaii. At each destination, connect with other Star Citizen players and bond over a mutual love of space trading and what not. At that point, the trip becomes worthwhile.
Buy a Round of Starbucks for Everyone in the Building
Alcohol is one thing but nothing says “I have $27,000 and I want everyone to know it” more than buying frappes and macchiatos for an entire Starbucks. Who’s the big shot handing out scones like no one’s business? You, that’s who. Also, notice that I said, “A round” and not “rounds”. You may have $27,000, but this is still Starbucks we’re talking about.
Make Your Own Game
If Star Citizen can raise millions of dollars with fancy ships and unrealized promises, so can you. $27,000 is a solid start to kickstart (pun intended) your new career as an indie dev. Buy a powerful PC, a few software licenses, and get to work on your Star Citizen clone-*ahem*-competitor: Starnite. It’s more or less the same game but boasts a super trendy battle royale mode. After all, what’s the point in splurging that much money on ships if they can’t outlast 99 other vessels in last-man-standing combat? You’ll thank me after Drake flies into your game with his thousand-dollar harrier.
Become Richie Rich
This is vaguer but if you’re like me, you grew up watching Richie Rich. More specifically, you grew up wanting to be Richie Rich. The child gazillionaire had it all: a cool mansion (complete with its own McDonald’s), a faithful butler, and his family even had their own Mount Rushmore. $27,000 may not be enough to afford some of those luxuries but its a more than solid start. At the very least, you can afford to buy truckloads of Richie Rich DVD’s because the film is just that entertaining. Or at least it was back in the 90’s.
Donate to Charity
I mean, it certainly wouldn’t hurt.
A Scrooge McDuck Money Bin
If you’re going to blow an obscene amount of cash on something frivolous, at least do it in style. And it doesn’t get any more flashy than this. For the same price as a bunch of fake ships, you could cash that out for a butt-ton of coins, dump them into a room, and live out your DuckTales fantasies. My advice: resist the temptation to actually high-dive into your thousands of dollars worth of coins. That won’t play out nearly as well as it does in the cartoon.
Do you have any more suggestions on how to spend $27,000? Share your ideas in the comments below!